How to Play Croquet…(we think)

These photos are going to give you a very specific image of my family. Please disregard. Overall, we are not nearly this preppy, posh or fussy (not that there’s anything wrong with that either). But last weekend, we had a little extended family gathering with a croquet match.

My aunt found a book of croquet rules and gave it to my grandmother for her birthday. Croquet is my grandmother’s game, but no one else ever really knew the rules. Instead, we played by my grandmother’s rules and my grandfather was always a little dubious.

So this weekend, we used the book of rules, roped in 12 family members, and played an epic round of croquet. In the end, my grandmother (teamed with my ultra-competitive father who did dance moves that would be banned by the NFL every time he nailed a wicket) schooled us all, to spite that darn rule book.

Here’s how we play*:

Set up the court like this. Get into six teams of two – because more people make for more laughs. Hit the ball with the mallet through the wickets to the stake. If you go through a stake, you get an extra turn; if you hit another ball, you get an extra turn. Expect an attrition rate of about fifty percent – we lost people at an alarming rate, so this is another good reason to have so many players. When someone wins, call it a day. Croquet can be one long game! Optional: cocktails and bug spray. Some of us needed both.

Michael was a natural, until he ditched the game to cheer for the Irish football team playing against Croatia. He should have stayed with the croquet – he was the only one who could have given my grandmother any competition!

My brother showed up dressed to win. He’s trying out a new look – croquet chic. He’s still got a little work to do on his game though.

The champion herself, showing off the winning technique.

And that about sums up the Boyle/Foley/Westbrooks school of croquet. Does your family play? Any fun rules we haven’t discovered yet?

*No guarantees we’ve taken any of that new rule book to heart!